Judah

well tonight we had worldwide evangelist Chris hill with us all the way from Texas.
I'm resenting that i did not get a personal word with him, as he was without a doubt the most brilliant preacher i have yet come across, however as one well knows it is not the preacher that is important it is god's word, the preacher is merely god's puppet for giving us his message (and oh lord what a beautiful puppet show it is.)

tonight was without a doubt the most amazing experience in my life, in terms of praising god i have never felt such satisfaction, such a sense of elation, joy and ecstasy. as my previous post pointed out i only wish that word's could describe my experience to you all however the fact that they can't is what makes these moments so precious to us. after tonight i fell as if god has touched me, we really did connect and he has certainly sowed a seed in my heart that i will nurture and harvest for the rest of my life. my brother Sam ( and a few others) asked me to find out what denomination this church classed itself as, i was going to but i now see that irrelevant, i feel at home in this church god is without a doubt calling me to work with this church. my official next steps are to arrange my baptism and get as involved in the church life that i possibly can. it's funny that i now find myself not wanting to go to school next year again but this time for a completely different reason, i don't want to waste time i want to get straight out there with god's message of salvation for other's ( i will however go next year as its an opportunity best taken a hold of.)

Chris hill preached in the lunch service on the book of Joshua and the crossing of the Jordan river and the laying of the stones in the river, in the night service he preached on genesis 38 (yes the whole chapter) Judah directly translates to praise, this chapter in genesis is a very deep and controversial chapter, i see it as a metaphorical analogy of the very ethics of Christianity itself.

i will not try to repeat everything that was said tonight as i do not have the capacity to do so, but the main message was that it's time for us as a nation, as a generation to grow up, to let go of the cheap pleasures that this world can offer us and to reach out to god, we need not to wait around anymore for thing's to happen (a building doesn't build itself) we need to act.

i always had a bit of a mind block on my faith for god, and i can now assure you that it is eradicated, so many times i have said "god I'm surrendering all to you, the glory will all be yours, i want you to use me for your own purpose, my pain my suffering doesn't matter, it is nothing to what wonder's your love can inspire" so many times have i also wanted so badly to believe in that very speech, yet there was always a block on my mind which would ask "really?"
that's all it needed to ask to present doubt in my mind, that voice is gone now, i need not worry about my suffering anymore, about what other's think of me, i am no longer ashamed of the bible and the salvation it offers.

an example of how much time i am now devoting to god's purpose, i just delayed the wiriting of this post for two reason,s. to have a theological?philisophical conversation with a friend about the existence of god and the differences about christianity to any other religion, and to help a friend in need. my only purpose i see fit for myself is to help other's, as i have pointed out a few times now, i feel as thoguh that is my purpose in life, my very name means "god be my judge" and i shall live by that in every aspect for now on.

i really don't know what else to say, i just feel so great today, i don't want to let this feeling stop and i don't intend to. i intend now to use my time wisely and my resources even wiser.